Slampo breaks one of his New Year’s Resolutions (not to take Chronicle pontificators so seriously), and it’s all sorts of fun for readers!
Up first: Metro/state editorialist and gossip columnist Rick Casey’s Friday column. Here’s an excerpt from Slampo:
Perhaps it would be possible for Andrea Yates, with lots of love and attention, with a goodly serving of newfound self-esteem, with morning tai chi sessions and afternoons with Dr. Phil videos, and, most importantly, with a finely calibrated regimen of pharmaceuticals (we’d suggest it include whatever medication that Lea Fastow lady was/is on—that looked to be some powerfully good shit) to maximize her potential, to somehow set aside the nagging fact that she killed her kids and live a most fulfilling and productive life in psychiatric confinement. Perhaps she could write a book (perhaps Rick Casey could be co-author!) and be temporarily furloughed to be interviewed on Oprah, or to make a blockbuster-ratings appearance being chatted up by Diane Sawyer from the inside.
Read the whole thing. It’s just wicked, good ridicule.
Slamp then turns his attention to MeMo:
Even though Kent isn’t willing to play the role in which Guillermo would cast her, the columnizer weirdly calls on “mote-and beam bloggers” and right-wing pontificators Ann Coulter and Laura Ingraham, as well as the mayor and firefighters union, to join her in her outrage (although, as it usually does with smug and too-comfortable commentators, the “outrage” here sounds entirely feigned). Apparently the mote and/or beam in Guillermo’s eye so obscured her vision that she couldn’t closely read her own paper’s front-page story, wherein it’s clearly stated that state law dictated Kent’s circumstance. Once the eye problem clears up, maybe for her next writing assignment the columnist could find out the names of her state rep and senator and dash off angry letters to them (or better yet, try to figure out the relations between local lawmakers and the city’s uniformed-employee groups—that’d keep anybody busy for the next decade).
More wicked, good writing.
Please go read the entire post and not just the excerpts. And add Slampo to your bookmarks/bloglines. That guy sure is entertaining.
